I'm Stopher and I will be taking this journey with you in hopes of discovering and affirming a part of myself that has rarely been given space to explore. I have generally felt very confident with myself and my body and it is my hope that through this project others will find the space to affirm their identity too.
With the help of great friends, the amazing artistic talents of Terry Cyr, and with support from the Montana Gay Men's Task Force, we are exploring a new way to look at our communities of gay, bisexual, transgender, Two Spirit, queer, and non-identifying men*. You will see me use the astrix (*) often and this will denote the word is to be used inclusively in describing these identities.
Everyday gay men* are subjected to hundreds upon hundreds of images of men from the media. We are socialized to believe that we must all fit one mold. We must be trim, fit, tall, smart, strong, brutish, laconic, emotionless, unfeeling, cold, wealthy, of one race, and removed. These themes are seen over and over in imagery of men. Social Media has distorted our look at our bodies and what we are supposed to look like. Hook-up apps have often left us feeling isolated and unwanted. As men*, we have some pretty high expectations to live up to, and that can be a lot of burden to carry. And frankly, it's unhealthy.
I think there is a better way. I think that way is through self discovery and building confidence in our own perceptions of our body image. Everyone has some attractive feature. Beauty is subjective which lends itself to interpretation-- open to others. I believe that in some way everyone is beautiful.
This distorted look at who we are has caused us to lose some of our identity and I want it back! I think it's time we show ourselves in a new light with the help of my friend Terry. Together we hope to build a calendar to share with the community to show what Montana men* really look like and to tell our stories!
I look forward to embarking on this journey with you and I invite you to join me. Let's stand up and show them what Montana men* are made of!
Best,
Stopher
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